Regrets..

Sitting at the top staircase of the Five Storeyed temple, or Nyatapola as the locals say, i'm searching for the path to vindicate myself from all the painful experience that I've been experiensing for the past few weeks. Music playing on my earphone while writing this note just makes me focus on what i shud've done in the past instead of what i had done. Seeing people walking back home after as the moon starts to shine, i think i must've done the same when it was never too late. Yet i'm sitting here listening to the bells chiming as the wind blowing makes the hanging bell move. The darkness portraying that its too late for me to get back from what i take it as the chance that i have lost way earlier than i had realized my mistakes. Definitely regrets Are there as i gaze people walking in front of me. I had ignored all the signs that was indicating the implications of what it seemed meaningless and now here i am looking behind my past and blaming myself for all. They say time heals everything and its for time to make me go with the flow an live my life to fullest. Untill those days get back, I dont see any silver lining to the dark clouds that have been hovering over me....

Curiosity!!

Why is the earth the only place where you can find life?  And how could it sustain life for millions of years with evolutions following evolutions as the time has passed. What really makes me wonder is that the nature found it's balance among the living beings in such an intricate way that even a perfect supercomputer can't match it's preciseness. We are at the height of our human evolution. Can we surpass it and walk towards the path of superior beings that what we are right now? Human beings may be the superiors in terms of intelligence but we can look at any other examples like dolphins and chimpanzees who have intelligence. How did the humans find their way to superiority? Can we ever come in contact with any superior beings in the future?  The question remains unanswered till now.......

For A Friend

It’s a wonderful feeling you know, when you have a friend to talk to in the saddest of the times and when you have someone to talk to in person and share all the happiness with each other, it’s just so much better than being alone in a room and sulking around for hours and hours. Not that I don’t have many friends, in fact I do have loads of them, the lads from my school, my high school buddies and my college pals have been extraordinarily close to me in my whole life. Yet, we met, under one of the most unpredictable circumstances and even more surprisingly, we became very good friends in a matter of months. We share almost everything that we do every other day, we talk about each other a lot, moreover we enjoy each other’s company, be it online or in person. I am really grateful that I found you when almost all hopes were lost in me. I had stopped believing in myself yet you were there to help me with it. Reviving the lost confidence, enjoying every single moment of the life again and most importantly, I am the same person that I had been quite a few years ago, the same cheerful guy, ever smiling and making others smile. Glad that I found you my friend. Thanks for being there for me in my most difficult days. I'll make sure, that I'm gonna be there when you need me and will make sure that the cute dimpled smile on your face will never fade untill im around......

Crawling

Somedays are just like the days when you think you are invincible, while there are the others when u are like the most vulnerable creature crawling through the darkest alleys of the darkest streets in some of the cruelest of places. Realizing the mistakes you have done over the past is certainly a good one but making up for the things that you have ruined is a tough one to crack, even worse when you want to make up with another person and that person does not even consider doing that because of what you had done or said to that person. Yes, some things are done out of sheer foolishness while some are done on purpose, if you say the things you did because of your anger is a foolishness, then I cannot disagree more than anyone. While some things are done on purpose but you might not have any regrets while letting it happen. The regrets you will have is when you ruin everything you valued more than your life. Its an aweful feeling and you just cannot let go of it no matter how much you wish. Time may heal everything but whenever you come across anything that might cause the sudden strike of remembrance, then it starts all over again. These things might not apply to you if you’re not a normal human being without feelings. I know people have time and again been telling me that its out of utter foolishness and stupidity that I may be feeling like this but when you love someone so truly, with all your heart, no one can help you, actually its impossible to let go everything, let alone easily. Moving on might be an option, yes it is an option, but would that help the cause? Would that make you feel better? In some way it can, but the love you had for the person will never be replaced no matter how much you make yourself believe that it is not true, you always end up feeling it. Well that’s all I can come up with right now. I may be writing some useless shit but yes, I am writing from the bottom of my heart, the loneliness, the solitude, the exams might not be helping the cause, but I want that person to know that I am going to be there no matter how much I am hurt, no matter how much I am disheartened, all I want her to know that my love for her has never been so strong and will never weaken by some mere foul words that might come up with her irritation as a result of me being so “stuck with everything”.

Pros and Cons Time

Living in a hotspot of the town has its own ups and downs. Being a "sahariya" itself, has its advantages and disadvantages. So, living in this part of the town, Thamel, as it has been called for ages, I have been experiencing many bitter sweet memories over my lifetime. Though I'm a mere youngster in his early 20s, I have been enjoying my life to the fullest in the expense of my studies, which I shouldnt have neglected all these time. So, back to Thamel thing, whenever anyone of my "new" friends ask about where I live and I reply back "Thamel", I get almost the same reaction from them, "Whoa!! THAMEL!! Moj cha hai! Thamel ma ghar!!", which sometimes does feel good, but for me its the same, whether u live at Thamel or some other place. Its not that I have problem with these remarks but as I've said earlier, it has its own ups and downs.

The main advantage you have is you can hang around anywhere and anytime and dont have to worry about late night cabbies ripping you off!!! Another pros is you're at walking distance away from any main point of the city, it may be New Road, or Durbar Marg or the malls as well. I don't have to worry about the pack micros and short tempos to travel while I walk, which is quite good for health too!!! ( So my secret for a lean and fatless body is walking!!! hehe ;) ). Thamel, a tourist hub of the town, is a great place to relax and take a walk just to get rid of the stress you have due to studies and work. Just a walk for 10 or 20 minutes in the evening, and you're fresh!!

I've spent almost all of my life in Thamel. From the time when I waited for my school bus during my childhood to this very day, Thamel has experienced various changes, not physically but for the people, infratstructures and of course its push towards being a Tourism Destination cum Business Hub. The locals whom I used to know from Thamel are mostly either abroad or have shifted some other 'Peaceful' places (Do note my stress towards Peaceful). And there's the "nighlife" of Thamel, for most people it would sound quite wierd that I'm not a big fan of Thamel's nightlife, specially within my neighbourhood's part of Thamel. The reason - infamous "Dohori Sanjhs" and "Dance Bars". The noise from them are really irritating. To make it worse the building next door to my place has a "Dohori Restaurant" in it. The 7 pm -12 am part of the day is the most tormenting part of the day. The irritating music, the screeching voices, low quality sounds and worst sort of singers just make it a lot worse that it sounds. My friends who come to my place for a couple of hours during the evening time cant stand the noise....imagine how have I been living with the sound for 6 friggin years. Why cant they come up with sound proofing stufss? Doesnt social repsonsibility come up to their mind while starting out these businesses and why is the government so mum about these things? I'm sure loads of complaints regarding the noises come up to the desks of the local authorities!!

I dont know what Im Talking about

2:11 AM in the morning, stricken with fever, and im here wide awake, not able to sleep and trying to write something on this blog. As I recall, its been more than 4 months since i've updated or written anything over here. Partly I've been quite occupied with my own works and some other stuffs that i have prioritized but not anymore, exams are going on but as usual im in no mood of studying or preparing for them though i have been trying a lot better that i did with my previous 7 semester exams. Since, i am totally clueless about what to write, I will go on about how my favorite team in the Premier League, yes Manchester United, has been doing lately. Three weeks into the season, as expected it has been a slow start. With 3 or 4 quality pre-season signings, United were hopeful to start off the season brightly with a win agains Everton at Goodison Park at the first round of the league. The things don't usually go as we think, do they? With superior physical ability, the Toffees were able to snatch the win despite of some heroic efforts of our young goalie David De Gea. He could've done nothing to save the shot from the Man of the Match performer Maroune Fellaine of Everton. With that loss, the second round league game was a must win match for the Reds as the lads prepared their first home game. A good game but a nervy ending thanks to Nemanja Vidic's 65th minute own goal made the score 3-2 against Fulham at Old Trafford. In that game, two signings Shinji Kagawa and Robin Van Persie started off their Old Trafford debut with goal a piece for the both of them and Rafael Da Silva scoring another one from a header to make it three. And then, on Sunday, United visitedSt. Mary's Stadium to face off against Southhampton, a newly promoted club returning to the English Top Flight Football after 7 long years. After going 1-0 down, United came back strongly and scored the equalizer via RVP in the first half. Second half showed us more drama as the Saints scored another one thanks to another defensive fraility of the fullbacks. 2-1 down, United were awarded a penalty, only for RVP to miss it. Paul Scholes comes off the bench and before you know it, he starts to dictate the field with his pin point passing (at 37 years of age, age is just a number for him). And the comeback kings get back into the business as they score another equalizer in the 87th minute and adding another one in the injury time, thanks to RVP for the both goals. The game finished 2-3 to United but, even with the win, United still need to work a lot harder to have that striking quality they had last season. I know its too early to judge them, but the Reds need to improve on their full backs and the midfield where they were looking most vulnerable.

Two weeks long international break might be the best way to assess the development of the team at the moment, so lets stay hopefull!!!!! B.E.L.I.E.V.E

Sadvav Rally: AN INSIGHT

I WAS THERE YAY!!

For all of us, who had been really pissed off with the recent bandhs and strikes, a bandh-free day was full of excitement because it was a non banda day afterall. One of my friend even expressed her pleasure on her facebook status upon hearing a khalasi shout " kalanki, balkhu...." on her way to work (what a relief for her). Finally i could hear the titiiis and pwo pwopss..of the vehicles rolling on the streets, not that i am a big fan of horns blowing up unnecessarily, but it was somewhat good to know that people are back to there normal daily routine, even if its temporary though. Dunno what i did the whole day, but the evening was pretty much fun filled and eventful as well. With lots of promotion about the "Brihat Sadvav Sabhaa" on facebook for two days, friends on facebook were constanltly asking me whether i'd go or not, which i went of course. Eventhough, the venue had to be changed from Basantapur to DurbarMarg due to last minute "Nishedh Chetra Ghosana", the number of people turning out in the event was massive. The moment i reached the turning of the Palace Meuseum, I could see hundreds, if not thousands of National Flags being waved in the air. From that moment onwards, i had this feeling that this evening would go extremely well. I could even meet lots of familiar faces after really long time. From school time seniors to my current teachers, dais and didis from the facebook campaign we had initiated almost a year ago and many friends. It was some different experience for me as a whole because i was simply catching up with them and roaming around. Yes, the reason for which i went there was different, but i ended up meeting so many old friends and acquaintances that i forgot what i was there for. It was a great feelingm u know to see thousands of flags and with a flag wrapped around ur shoulders, definitely patriotism was there, BUT, therz always a BUT, seeing many familiar faces did take me to the good old times where we used stand on the footpath raising some banners, and shouting out the slogans at the rallies. The main point for me is will the people, who came up today, also come again time and again because i know that the leaders of Nepal arent the best of the commiters, will they be quite again after some time, shouldn't they realize by now that we should do something on our own to make things right? How long are we to leave the fate of our country and constitutions to some bunch of corrupted wankers? We need to think about these questions and ask ourselves should we go for it or not!!! And i know if we stand together we will definitely succeed!! CHEERS!!! JAI NEPAL

ARGGGGHHH!!!!!!

I can't stand it anymore. I'm really losing my mind right now. One party takes back the pre-announced indefinite strike after some "bartaalaaap" with the ministry officials and now an old logger-head party is coming up with another bandha. Do these guys even have any idea how a normal person has to go through each and every single bandhas and they call themselves "buddhijiwis netaz" who care about normal citizen and their civil rights. My message to these friggin shit-faces is "YOU ARE TAKING AWAY OUR CIVIL RIGHTS BY ORGANIZING A FRIGGIN STRIKE"...we don't care what your wishes are, we just want a perfect environment to live, to earn and to make our future better. We're done expecting things from the so called leaders.

DIVIDE AND RULE?????

So, the first post of this blog or my first proper blog as in written blog is here and up alive. I've been thinking of starting to write and to my utter dismay the laziness factor always had diverted my mind away from striking out my thoughts.

Well, i can go on talking abt anything endlessly and sometimes baseless as well. Talking and writing is different of course but the things that are on your mind are better expressed in words rather than blabbering and spitting out the words from your mouth. Now that's my point of view though, no offence to people who talk a lot. Now that I've introduced my utter love for speaking out my thoughts, I'd like to move into some serious stuffs that has been going on in our beloved country. The thing that has been intriguing people from all the age groups and that is "THE MIGHTY FEDERALISM", whoa came up with just like that. Everyone is talking about FEDERALISM and how it is to be approached. And up until recently, people are turning into racists by coming up with plans to divide the country on the basis of caste and ethnicity. Surprise surprise people!!!!!!!! As if never ending sagas of Bandas and Hadtaals were never enough for us.

Today, I was walking with my friend at my college and i got to eavesdrop what a certain junior in my college had to say about the States on the basis of caste and ethnicity. According to him, this is a flawless ideology, the caste and ethnicity based states. Trying to convince his friend that it is the best option as Nepal, being a multi-ethnic country, can go towards the path of prosperity if this thing really happens. What he had to add was by doing so each and every citizen from every ethnic group can have their own state so as to have the people from their group to rule that state and blah blah blah...he went on.

REALITY CHECK--------> at the present context of the world, people should stay united and not go for the division based on ethnicity or any race. If they do so, they are complete fools and are supporting racism. Every human being from any kind of race is a human being, so there is no point of dividing the country on the basis of ethnicity. I cannot see how this thing can help the people from ethnic groups, they cant expect their state to be ruled if their own people are not well educated, it would be a big failure. If they want to have their share of ruling the states, why not go for a geographical division and rule the states as per their qualification. Now that looks like a fair deal. People are simply being brainwashed just because their ethnic group has been on the receiving end of the age old domination from certain castes. If they really want to come up what they should go for is proper education and healthy competetion for governing the state, not going for states like Newa-RAjya, Tamubaan, Kiratbaan, etc.